Monday, September 29, 2008

No more clog's in Blogs..please

This post is not going to give any positive vibes. People who are here for that please drop in another day because I am going to write a post that is very unlike me...Infact forgive me if it doesn’t sound civil enough because am a newbie writing such a post This post is about few incidents in the blog world that has shattered and pained me a lot. I could never imagine blog space could cause so much anguish in me.

The people whom the blog is for could either correct your ways and be a better person or rather remain the pseudos you are now…The choice in entirely yours…

When I started of blogging I was amazed by the media and the ability of bloggers to connect, share ideas, inspire people and spread happiness amongst the ordinary Joey’s and Phoebe’s…And I always believed in that . People who I mean when I talk about such bloggers know who they are and how much I like them. Unfortunately many of them don’t blog now for different reasons…Then my close friends started reading the blog and encouraged me and chided me when I deserved one…only the best of friends would do that for you…

I might have been quite narrow minded back when a few months into blogging, I was curious about how many comments I got or how many linked to my blog...Those are natural feelings that as a novice blogger I went through…But then few months in the space it is expected that you as a blogger matures as much as you as a person. The blog should eventually evolve beyond the self importance of the blogger.

Recently there was a post in a very popular blog which attracted a potpourri of opinions from the very own diaspora of people it identified with…My personal judgment did not agree to the entire content of the post… But what I vehemently disagree even more is the nature in which the comments in the blog turned out to be, where instead of a sensible discussion turned into a ugly war of words where few were trying to impose with their emphatic statements…I appreciate difference in opinions and infact agree very much to some points mentioned there. But then you to tend to loose respect when the pseudo hot blooded personal attacker in you overwhelms sensibility and the intend behind your comment…I was a victim of such narrow thoughts too where I failed to appreciate the post from a subjective manner and the malayalee in me overwhelmed how I was interpreting the post. Did commenter’s presume the blogger was having delirious pleasure writing that post?? And wondered whether the blogger might have been as much agonized while writing about a place which he himself feels so dear about…?? Why the hate mongers are not mature enough to realize the greater and noble intent behind that blog??

Another blogger is constantly bombed with hate mails just because the blogger has an opinion...An opinion which you and I may agree or disagree , albeit in a manner honorable …But then again I have often seen people forgetting that and resorting to personal potshots.. What has happened to all the civility of the civilized world you claim to be part of? I regret almost being swayed by opinions of bloggers and commenter’s who have no idea about what the essence of blogging is about…I repent succumbing and patronizing to some of those opinions too. Every blogger worth his conscience should realize that your blog, your blog persona, your comments, your web hits and your popularity in blog world doesn’t make you a different person than what you really are. If you want to become a different person or bring a change to someone, do it in action, in real life…I don’t know whether you would realize what I mean if you have already started reading this post thinking of ways to counter and comment in exceptionally thunderous eloquently worded statements to put yourself in a superior standing. Frankly I don’t care. Because you might stand on higher pedestal in your imagination but not in mine….not because I am offended by you ...coz I am sorry for you…

And lastly folks who think they have become heroes and geniuses by commenting as anonymous and creating dummy blogs to malign other bloggers personally…Maybe you are an expert in mouthing the most rhyming obscenities in the world and do it with élan of a Mozart… Why byte more than you could chew because such fake bravado might be appreciated by a coterie which you think you are part of. You might have LOL and ROTFL moments and glorify amongst yourselves thinking how great it was when you pulled it off…What do you gain in creating such groups for a despicable reason...? Think about it... Maybe you can hurt people for a few seconds…for a few hours or maybe a day…But how far? All what comes to my mind is somewhere there must exist an ‘Animal Farm’ of bloggers!!

Stop being a propagandist blogger and being part of “lets-diss-someone” together group!! Don’t we have enough of those in real life?

I wish and pray blogger’s realize and enjoy blogging for what it was originally intended for…. To introspect…To invoke thoughts…To share a laugh…and to see the funny side of life

I have had enough introspection on this topic myself and advices are not solicited. Comments are moderated for the same reason.
I have never felt so bad writing a blog and hope this is my last.
I badly need a smiley now…
If someone itches to call me names…same pinch...and I wouldn’t publish your comments…;-P


Abhi said...

Though i didn't read the actual post that made you write this blog, i could very well identify with some incidents like sets to malign the good words of another blogger. My class in college had a blog and i was one of the mod's. Bt we had to close it up coz two guys started a rain of abusing posts to guru each other and ppl who read the posts ended up thinking all of my class is like that. It happens in real life, so it's bound to happen in virtual life as well, after all it's only humans who write such posts; human's who've emotions like hatred, anger, jealousy etc.

PS: Here's the smiley you asked for :-)

Anonymous said...

:-) Here is your smiley Mathew.

Unfortunately some bloggers used statements without any legs. If one's blog is well read then the blogger should not assume and presume that he or she can write anything as with fame comes more responsibility. A reader takes a blog post by face value not by the blogger's psyche or thought process. Also someone's arrogance made other bloggers write not so good comments. isn't that the truth? Just a third person's observation by the way.

Pooja Nair said...

My dear mathew!!!

I think that the blog world, like the real world harbours all kinds of people. Can't be helped.

thing is when one has no substance in his/her arguement one tends to get offensive,rude and personal.

their aim is to shift the subject to abuses becasue thats all that they are damn good at. :) trick is to not fall in the trap.

We must calmly continue to make our point. that will make them real mad...:)

You are right we can only feel sorry for them. they are mis-guided and shallow and they don't know it.

And here's a smiley for you - :)

check out these blogs - its owned by a 7 yr old and a 9 yrar old respectively:

mathew said...

on second thoughts smiley's are not for me..they are for bloggers who are being victimised by such people..

I request such people to change for the better..or I hope they realise it some point in their life.

The post is not about the blogger or what they write..People often mistake good intentions for arrogance..or maybe we prefer to see some people in that light...I have had made such mistakes in the past. And I think that is already debated well in the blogs about this topic..

I wrote this post because I myself was almost falling for the trap and am glad that I realised before falling for it..And this is against bloggers who try to go beyond the essence of blogging.

mathew said...

Blog world contains all kind of people..and unlike in real world we can afford to ignore. thats the saving grace.

I am glad that you realised the gist of the post. and thanks for showing what blogging is all about..

Deepti said...

Cheer up mathew .. is it worth spending so much of our time discussing people who are not worth even a mention .. let them go ahead and be rude .. they wont change no matter what

thomas said...

I too am deeply saddened at what happened b/w the bloggers. I fear this will get nasty. Until recently I didn't know what was going on. I got notified on what actually happened and I'm not taking anyone's sides. The problem should've been solved in that blog itself. Now bloggers are taking sides and i feel that things are getting nasty. I hope that harmony will be brought back and things are solved.

How do we know said...

arre fantastic!! This is one lovely post!!
After the first para disclaimer, i was looking forward to lots more gaalis, but well.. this was rather civilised :-) (u said u cld use a smiley, tho i m sure u've got many now)

Anonymous said...

Tom...for people to take sides you need two sides. This is just a couple of bad elements against the rest of the peace loving blogger community. So I would not worry too much if I were you.

mathew said...

I am much better off today than how i was feeling yday it worth? YES..I still believe that any wrong can be undone if you wish to..

Already told you what I intended to in mail..thats what I want the least to happen to take sides without a reason..
I sincerely wish as you said..."hope that harmony will be brought back and things are solved."

All the intent behind the post is not to fuel more hatred (though the tone maynot suggest so as I was not thinking too much while writing how the reader is gonna percieve it)
but to correct and reconcile..

@How do we know
I am happy if someone realises what i mean in the post.

Superficial Gibbering prater said...

I wish this is the last post of its kind and that achayan is back to his rib-tickling humourous best very very soon.

നിലാവ് said...

Mathew, I don't know what went wrong and why you are so upset. But as good/bad always co-existed...cheer up...and have a lot of smilies..

And please don't quit...

wish you all the best ..

Anonymous said...

You do realise you're scaring newbie bloggers, don't you? ;)

On a serious note, I understand what you are on about. I had read the post you mentioned and some of the comments too. But on the whole, I can't help feeling that too much importance is being given to what others think or appear to think. It's your blog. You require opinion. take what you require and chuck the rest. Abuses are a different matter though. perhaps moderation is the only way then.
Somehow seeing you enable comment moderation suddenly looks even more ominous than this post.

I do not have been personally subjected to anything you refer to, since I haven't been here long enough. Maybe once I am, I will see things in a different light too.

silverine said...

Message delivered and hope heeded. I guess there is a flash point for everything. And the last incident was it. I wrote the post because the whole incident gave Malayalee bloggers a bad name. People were telling me that we fight everywhere, even on the Internet and some people sent me links of agreeable discussions going on in the Internet. That's when I saw the larger picture. And I felt so ashamed!! :( The damage is done. Lets hope we can rectify past wrongs and redeem our names in the future.

p.s I heard the RAW and IB want coders, you know the people who write mails in code so the enemy wont decipher it. Because this was coded language at its best! lol!! :)

scorpiogenius said...

mmm...sometimes we are not able to detach ourselves emotionally from what we read and understand. We want to stick on to our opinion and lash out at those who differ. And people getting too much personal is what makes a forum or a blogspace malignant.

We know too many of such platforms dont we, when your intellect forces you not to publish ur honest opinion just bcoz you fear someone may take it personal. Well, if someones overinflated ego is punctured by ur harmless opinion then its not ur fault. You still have the right for ur opinion, and stand by it. As per guys who get a bit too close for comfort, take the parallel route or hit the 'delete' button.

I hope this post is read by some of my net-friends out there... They may learn a lesson or two..:))

mathew said...

thanks..and i hope so too..
it wasnt a pleasure writing this either..

Thank you..and I hope to blog for some more time..

not scaring anyone..if someone is scared its me..sacred of losing the goodwill of blogs in general..

already told what i wanted to say..
lets hope better times..

well intent is some learns rather than someone take offence on it..

Praveen said...

atlast somebody spoke up on this. been seeing a lots of personal comments and posts that seem to echo the tune 'v for vendetta'. As a responsible blogger, one should realise where to draw the line.

and yeah, its better to have moderated comments. Me, myself was subject to truckloads of abuse that used to fill up my mailbox every other day.

Anonymous said...

natural that you spoke it out.Thats it.After all,this is what we call life,having everything natural..the balancing act we may learn from experiences ! nothing to regret.Coz' whichever we may choose,we are tend to regret.Again thats humans.
yeh jo zindagi ki kitab hai..yeh kitab bhi kya kitab hai..
Just listen to jagjit,if u r interested.

Anonymous said...

What you talk about happens not just on blogs but on every communication point on the internet, like forums, social networking sites, newsgroups, even mailing lists.

A wise friend once said this to me, "Nish, it's just text at the end of the day"

I thought that simple sentence has such profound meaning. I'd like to pass on those words to you.

Macadamia The Nut said...

Chee! I won't give you a smiley 'n all! I'll give thee a BEEEEg hugsie instead

Eff those weirdos. Blogsworld merely imitates life

Anonymous said...

I can feel the intensity of the incident from your words. I dont know what it is though. It is true that good and bad co exists. The big bad wolf lurks in every shady corner. To ignore, run, dodge or fight it depends on the position encountered. We have to use our better senses to deal with it. Wish you a speedy recovery from the impact. TC.

Anonymous said...

Nice write. Can you please publish it at the blog space at your work place also? It would be interesting to have some discussion on the matter at hand.

mathew said...

COmment is moderated only for this post..will be removed after i come up with a new one..

both bloggers and readers should now when to draw the line..

Thanks for the song..How come you know songs are my stress busters..;-P

I am doing fine now..just a bad day when i wrote it..

Nice to see you here..:-)
You must have had enough experience handling a community like you said what your friend is quite true..

Just that we are humans too..and sometimes we react when we are hurt..or when we get a feelind of dumped...

@Macadamia The Nut
hehehe...ayyo njan Zardari alla...;-P
thanks..and am actually doing was just a one day feeling of disgust..

@Sridevi R
thanks...This post was for people who bore the brunt..i just happened to know it..

Hey..I dont think this post warrants a place there..I actually want to close this chapter and forget it..I have had enough discussion on it already and I dont think I have to spread bad vibes anymore..this post was written for a few people who might have got the message and lets not make this a much bigger discussion..cheers...

VMJ said...

smiley onnum pattoola. oru kuppi naadan kallum korachu kappayum venel courier cheythekkaam. chekku, alla sorry 'matt' my man try if you can find a market for naadan kallu and market it as indian white(extremely) wine or something. :)

Unknown said...

finally it all comes down to "live and let live" I guess!

Anonymous said...

Not sure how to react since I am not completely aware of the problem. But if I got it right, sounds like a bad way starting a day with hate mails and comments. I have had quite a few instances of such comments or emails but not a lot. I guess its the serious bloggers who were daring enough to post thier mind that suffered. Hmm! Sad!

Anonymous said...

And Nish you are here too! I am giving you links to a lot many blogs!

Preeti Shenoy said...

hey Mathew,
I could feel the anger and the pain in this post.I am with you.
I have not come across any 'hate blogs' (may be because if something annoys me I don't read it)
Its horrible to have 'flame blogs' if that's what you mean.

mathew said...

hehehe..meen curryum koode ayichu thaa...pinee indian white wine evide nammakku hit aakaam..will you do the import export... ;-P

@Abraham Menacherry
yes... :-)

I think the message is clear to the people who need it..I am not feeling comfortable either seeing this post in my blog 2 days later... :-(

hahaha..I was wondering how come there was C++ in my blog...;-P

There were personal attack blogs as well as groupism for a wrong reason...anyways..i hope things would get better...thank you..