‘One Whopper Menu please’
‘With cheese or without cheese’
‘Ketchup or Maayo’
Well this conversation is quite familiar to most of you and shouldn’t have startled anyone...After all most kids these days say Daddy, Mummy and Mc Donald’s though not necessarily in that order…But this conversation is indeed SCANDALOUS considering the person who was answering to these questions was my DAD!! Now that’s like spotting Che Guevara in Las Vegas!! It is an incident that could potentially provoke midnight calls in family circles…”Kunjachen cheythathu arinjoo…”
Yes am seriously thinking of sending the video to Ripley’s Believe it or Not!!
Although I was guilty of underestimating there, I knew something’s that would never change…Amma wearing western formals cannot be even called hypothetical because it simply cannot happen. Cajoling from Indian westernized ammachis who graduated from chattayyum mundu-->saree-->western formals did not work! Anyways the Germans took it as an exotic oriental dress from the east.
The trip involved a lot of ‘First time doing’ and ‘First time seeing’ and other earth shattering events... Mom indulged in something offbeat and took part in extreme sports like "escalator boarding"!!...Needless to say by end of the trip she was a certified professional in Escalator Usage. Rookies back home at the malls would look in envy as she effortlessly wades out of an escalator , unlike the Anju Bobby George inspired leap that used to land her a few feet away… As mentioned earlier they did try some very exotic food called the BURGER and the PIZZA!! Thank god we have Indian restaurants everywhere in this world, you just have to follow the smell of the curry…That’s the best part with Indian restaurants…You don’t need directions to find it!!
Btw dad found the botanical garden (those unspeakable biological names) near my home as impressive as the Eiffel tower…Ugh!! Visits to the Vatican and Louvre museum though was interesting was at times boring. I mean you see something like a 3000 B.C Egyptian pottery. It doesn’t look much different from the overused meen chattis back home…neither can you impress someone with surrealist paintings of Van Gogh!!
Of coz there was the much anticipated faux pas too when Mom took the kitchen knife along in her bag to cut apples…We were waiting in the queue at the Eiffel when I came to know that her bag did contain a 'potential weapon' which I 'surrendered' to the security guard before the beeps went off. As he threw it away she was aghast...My pep talk on security, terrorist attacks did not cut any ice, talking of the lost knife…
Nevertheless we were lucky to after all get inside considering very few actual visits Eiffel tower with a knife!! Sigh…I have never understood the fascination woman have with knife!!
And If there was a Gullibility index or something I challenge anyone out here who can beat my Mom…I had perfectly made her believe that a city bus which we got into in Rome would now stop only in Venice and that we apparently got into the wrong bus….In Vatican any priest remotely walking by would be called the Pope…and I had fun making stories out of Berlin wall that extended till Great Wall of China long long ago…Well the Mumbo Jumbo that I blurt out had to be simply believed..;-P
Since I was alone this time around it did not reach the much hallowed heights she is capable of. Normally with bro and cousins we have a field day scoring points over the gullibility index of our aunts...
On seeing Mc Donald’s outlet at one of the malls, her highness Amma did say she did see one in cherthala, which I later figured out was an ad for Mc Dowell’s…Not to mention the height of insult when I wore a Arsenal jersey gifted by a friend...”Edaaa ithu ninakku Emirates fly cheythappol free kittiyathu aano”….My friend (a arsenal freak) says his club hasn’t been humiliated anyway like this before in his life.!!
The last few days of their vacation was indulged in shopping…As I told mom one of the best kept secrets of all foreign returnees…The gifts!!...a carton of facial tissues that cost only a few cents that would be split into packets of 100 each and given to all aunties along with a Dove Soap…a huge packet of snickers and Mars bought from Wal-Mart which would again be split (It is like what the Lord did with 5 appams and a fish, here the returnees do it with Snickers)... Though these tricks don’t work now as most people can make out Mars from a Lindt or Ferrero Rocher...A carton of shaving blades that would take care of the shaving needs of entire Kerala for a couple of years….I had to step in to stop the buying of goodies that looked like a relief package of sorts for a small country!!
Well the trip was memorable as much for me as for them...And as they left the shores (I mean the airport) back to old routines back home, I understood why everything in life is not constant….Happiness and joys are accentuated by periods of dullness and sadness…Love becomes what it is because of sacrifices...that’s what makes it worth it..
Like I mentioned in a old blog as we grow older we sometimes fail to recognize that everyone around us does too…As I saw their balding hair lines and saw how difficult it was for them to climb stairs after some decent walking around, there was nothing I could do about it…I took this chance to forget or rather accept these changes…Because what ultimately remains are just good old memories…
P.S. ..Listen to this classic Beatles..
Once upon a time…….. - *kadalinakkare ponore, kaana ponninu ponorekadalinakkare ponore, kaana ponninu ponore* *poy varumbol enthu kondu varum -- kai niraye* *poy varumbol enthu k...
7 years ago