Thursday, February 18, 2010

And life goes on!

During my vacation I was amused at how things haven’t changed much at home…Dad is still superstitious considering his strange belief that eating carrots are good for health…quite startling when you consider that he has a masters in botany!! Meanwhile Mom believes that we are facing a imminent shortage of food (which btw has no link to my consumption graph)…Why else would she insist on buying groceries every time I go out…Consider case studies below..

Me: ”Amma…I am goin out for a movie…”
Amma : “Buy 2 packets of milk and 10 eggs in that case…”
*duh…okay… :-I *

Me:”Amma…I am goin out to meet a friend…”
Amma : “Buy 2 packets of milk and 10 eggs in that case…”
*eh…now??… anyways… :-/ *

Me:”Amma…I am goin to Bombay …”
Amma :“Buy 2 packets of milk and 10 eggs in that case…”
* it can’t be!! :-O *

Me:”Amma…I am…”
Amma :“Buy 2 …” (stops abruptly)
Me : “What Amma..?”
Amma :“What were you saying?”
Me:”Amma…I am goin nowhere in life”
Amma: “okay.. :-I”
* gotcha!! ;-P *

Me:”Amma…I am goin to the grocery shop…Do you need anything? “
Amma :“nothing!”
Me: “NOTHING!!!!”

And after a brief pause.….

Okay….Buy 2 packets of milk and 10 eggs in that case…”
* and life goes on… *

Living in such tragic environs it’s also the envy of many to have a bro who believes in God for all the wrong reasons…In one particular instance which left me shaken and stirred was the sighting of this remarkable man, kneeling down as pious as a bishop from Rome and praying fervently at the church…

”I believe in God, the father almighty…creator of Mohanlal and chicken curry”…


And I was thinking all along…things would change somehow as he grew older!! Sigh!

But then there are certain things which you never expect would change as it was proved recently…After alighting from the car my brother quipped...”Amma…you don’t have to lock the door…I ll do it with the remote”. She overestimated the technological advances cars have made in recent decades and left the car door wide open... It was after a brief moment and a few minutes at the porch observing mom who in turn was waiting to see the door closing act did we realize her sky high expectations…My brother looked at me and said in a tone which was desperately seeking sympathy...

.”You are lucky, Chetta... After all you see things like this only when you come down on vacation…”


Vacation or no vacation, certain things are constant…As is tradition in our family coupled with a hereditary desire to bargain with vendors especially the ones who sell fish, it is often with religious fervor we go shopping to the city market…And when dad alights at the palayam market he is a new man.. A man possessed by a strong conviction to get the best bargain and the freshest piece of avoli…someone who wouldn’t actually mind arguing that the onakameen is not fresh … someone who believes strolling across those stinking puddles of water and listening to the maniac calls from the fisher folk is the equivalent of a julie andrews singing and prancing at the meadows in alps!!! I ll never understand that!! Neither the post script which happens at home after every trip to the market... Ever since dad retired, he is missing the biology lab classes he took in school…I was not surprised when he pinned down a chicken in a vitruvian pose and started pining tiny needles on its body parts and explaining to mom the digestive system of a chicken…Amma being the english teacher listened to it with the same curiousity a Shelley or Keats would have about E.Coli bacteria. Those were days when I literarily wished we had bt. brinjal for lunch instead!

And to seek solace I visited my cousin who lives in kottayam…someone who had gone through a rough patch himself…The last time I met him, his angst was very evident…Evocatively complaining about a lack of purpose in life….It was heartening to see a very positive change in his outlook…He looked like someone who attended a couple of “art of living” courses and Robin Sharma lectures….But the happiness lasted only for a few minutes when I figured out his purpose in life was playing hangman, raising sheeps and harvesting crops in facebook…sigh…atleast that keeps him happy!! And that’s when I overheard his nephew talking in the other room over the phone…

“This time Pytho Korah’s theorem sure question daa…”
“no...no...onnum pazhuthilla…”
“okay da…”
“Rascals lawyoo….ayyo...athinte chit undaakilla! “
“okay da…”
“ninte achan schoolil poyyittu undoo?”
“really!”
“ettaam class veryoo??”
“am sure daa…you can beat it!! Don’t worry!!”

*click*
The symbol of hope and the torch bearer of our legendary academic heritage doesn’t disappoint me…He would probably end up singing like Susan Boyle…. “I dreamed a dream in time gone by...”

And so would everyone in the family…………..

23 comments:

mirage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
scorpiogenius said...

lol, but why always milk and eggs? lotta calcium but cholesterol as well. I'll have to tell your mama that you're already into too much beer and she should stop pampering you with all this milk n eggs :P

Ashwathy said...

overestimation of the technological advancement in ur car... LOL :D

i agree with ur bro... u see gems like this only once in a year. but thats enuff to carry u over for the rest of the year too!! :D

Karthik Sivaramakrishnan said...

Your mom is a dear! Her 'aye aye oooo" still brings a smile to my face :)

Small Talk said...

Nice to c u bck in action....
Wait till ur 10 year old nephews/cousins strt poking u on FCBK....

Divs said...

look who is back!
you always put a grin on my face.
Now I am reminded of home..

And guess what.. now even my mom bets I can't make round chapathis... I sent a pic of a round one I made today. :P

thomas said...

Pytho Korah's theorem lol.When mom asks me to buy milk when i go out, my reply will be "njaan aa route vazhi alla pokunne".

Pinne, eating carrots are good for health. Nothing wrong with your dad's belief. Good for eyes, athu kondalle njaan ippazhum room-inte ange attathu irunnu konde Mathai-de blog vayikkunne.

Venkatesh A.R. said...

as usual, sooper post da.. I liked the one where your mom was waiting for your bro to lock the car!! ROTFL!
Are you done with your vacation? hope you had a nice one!

Deepti said...

Too good .. and bargaining for fresh unakkameen is priceless :)
Ur amma wont be too pleased abt hte car incident made public :D

How do we know said...

Wow... i was laughing out loud on this one.. all the way thru! Hows Philip now?

And that.. i m going nowhere in life .. too much!

mathew said...

@scorpiogenius
haha..atleast with milk its always in short supply in town...neverthless there is always something to be bought for home..;-D

@Ashwathy
i get a capsule update from bro and cousins about such interesting tit bits in the family..;-P

@Karthik
;-)

@Small Talk
haha..there would soon come a day when they would write posts laughing over our blunders..;-D

@Divs
hahaha...thats a god awesome feat as far as my skills are concerned!! congrats..;-P

@thomas
aah..well..i cant do it when am home only for a short while..maybe my bro does it..

i still believe those are antha viswhwasams..;-D

@Venky
thanks da..yeah..vacation was over long ago..back at work since jan..:)

@Deepti
hehe...i hope she would allow me enter home inspite of this..lol!!;-)

@How do we know
merci..;)
yeah.Philip is doin better..he had a surgery yday btw...i updated the earlier post actually..things though would take a long time looks encouraging..

wanderlust said...

Good to see you back in action again :-)

I guess all mothers (including me) are of the same stock. I try it with my hubby and he gives me one of those looks, but I am an eternal optimist :-)

Nona said...

I wish you take more vacations to write posts like these!

"unakkameen is not fresh". :)

And I guess your brother asked for it by mentioning the remote!

N said...

Hey! Carrots are indeed good for eyes! Your dad is not wrong!

And what were the last lines? I could not understand them :(

Happy Kitten said...

Great to see u back.. nd how is Philip now?

and I guess most of us are like your mother.. hate to run out of things in the kitchen but when the famous question is asked we dont know what we need!

technology can be overwhelming at times... :)

I remember the Palayam Fish market from many many years back... but still so fresh in my mind..

anN-series said...

i like the remote-control-door-closing episode!!! :~)

Reflections said...

Hahahahaaaaaa......*wiping tears from the eyes* we can enter ur mom & mine for a competition & see who takes the cake;-D

ur bro sounds like fun too ;-D

Maddy said...

mathewbhai - you come up with gems sometimes, this was so enjoyable..

mathew said...

@wanderlust
lol!! you are so right!:)

@Nona
well thats exactly my brother after that!;-D

@N
ofcoz..i know!:)
those last line would lose sense if translated in english..;(

@Happy Kitten
haha...bingo..thank god someone agrees!;-P
i remember as a school kid goin to palayam market in sunday mornings after church..:)

@Ann
hehe...i told mom that your feat is know to the outside world..;-P

@Reflections
hehe..there are far too many competitors..my cousins say the same..!;-D

@Maddy
thanks a lot!!:)

Cris said...

hehe you should have added some of your own classic quotes too!

shikha said...

Man, such entertaining vacations; I'm envious :D.

I love the "going nowhere in life" bait, Father Almighty's greatest two achievements, your mum's magical door theory, vitruvian chicken, and of course, the brilliant Pytho Korah. This post is as delectable as some of your recipes...Yum.

And oh, it makes me wanna go home, to MY set of incorrigibly sweet parents.

Aryan said...

hey Cherian, do you remember me? I am Subhasree from B section in kV pattom...
Nice blog and nice post..keep writing
Aryan's mom

Pallavi said...

OMG all mothers think alike.. this conversation reminds me of those I had with mum when I was a kid and not much has changed since.. Alas! As a kid every time I said Mum let me buy a chocolate she would say you know in 10 bucks you can buy so many eggs and a bread. And today when I tell her I am going out for coffee reply is more or less the same... Mothers mothers... but they still the most lovable of the lot.. :)