“Fellow country man…the time has come…the time has come for CHANGE....together WE CAN!”
...announced Pappu Yadav during the election rally..
Taking the cue his personal hedge fund manager made some well placed calls and got change in crisp 100 rupee notes from his stashed up Swiss bank accounts. According to Hero No 1,there are plenty of takers as its customary during holi time to bring CHANGE to the masses.
Meanwhile christians in Mangalore can finally observe the Holy week after convincing sena loks that its actually Holi week and confirming to the sacred book of Indian culture!! A generous Muthalik has agreed to a public holiday on Easter to emphasize that he is not anti-western as stereotyped… Danke schon bro!!
Election campaign is on full swing elsewhere…
Reporter: “Sir…what do you say about the campaign promises made during the last election”
Politician: “dekho…I promised to eradicate obesity related deaths in my constituency and I have kept my promise”
Reporter: “It’s true sir… People now die only of malnutrition or suicide”
Politician: “Well!! I kept my promises...isn’t?”
Reporter: “Sir…Could you please tell us the work you have done for you consistency in the last 5 years”
Politician:”Well...I have made my consistency pollution free…and the transport system has been improved to be environment friendly…we are a responsible people you know!”
Reporter: “But sir…There is not a single industry that has come up in your town and the train you promised never came!!”
Politician: “That’s exactly the point…”
Another reporter reports from Andhra Pradesh.
Election commission taking note of excessive spending orders Shakeela to keep things to bare minimum. Fans confused.
In Karnataka, IT minister’s confirms his statement about industry being in the pink of health was a slip of the tongue. Employees still confused.
A regional party in Kerala splits into five different factions. The erstwhile party president who suffers from split personality syndrome is not sure which faction he belongs to. Party workers confused.
The new manifesto from the left declares ambitious plans to land man in Utopia. Protests from ISRO scientist drowned in widespread cheering from cadres.
BSP manifesto mentions a Mayawati theme park in Guruvayoor.
Fevicol had recently announced that they will use the “third front” as their new brand ambassador...Unfortunately the plans are shelved as many of the pieces did not arrive in time for the shoot.
NGO from Pakistan arrives in India to study the election process. On the way back talking to the press they express satisfaction in understanding the working as presented by election commissioner except for two unfamiliar words...Free and Fair….They say its usual Few and Rare in their country!
News from abroad
Italian prime minister has extended an olive branch to the Greek president to end long standing hostilities...But new controversy opens when the president was caught on camera giving it to the presidential cook ..
Zardari, Nawaz Sharif and Musharaf were flying together. Zardari wanted the plane to land in Islamadabad…Sharif wanted to land in Lahore and Musharaf wanted to fly all the way till Karachi air force base…All three called up the pilot over the intercom… The pilot comes out, removes his mask and asks where is the nearest American embassy…Osama doesn’t like landing on airstrips he shouts! And there was silence.
Election masala news ends here…But I think there is some new fella coming up in Delhi who keeps us entertained every other day.. Thank you for listening and as Azharuddin might now say I am in it just to make a ‘silly point’!
*HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUMMY (thats how we call grandma) her snap in orkut says.."who said that 8 & 1 is 81; I'm just 18 "*
*Used to be a signature line by a friend in college.
Once upon a time…….. - *kadalinakkare ponore, kaana ponninu ponorekadalinakkare ponore, kaana ponninu ponore* *poy varumbol enthu kondu varum -- kai niraye* *poy varumbol enthu k...
7 years ago