Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Professionally angry..

In office sometimes our work life influence how we speak even for personal questions ,so much that last week one of my managers’ asked a pregnant colleague when the deployment date was for her baby and whether all milestones have been passed.

She replied back saying a visit to the doctor confirmed that the product was free of bugs and would be deployed as scheduled and probably ahead of schedule. That was when the configuration manager wanted to know more about the configuration of the delivery and she replied it was Boy.

It also often happens when we don’t get things done our way we resort to shakedown testing of errant colleagues. One person was even ignominiously asked to go get a patch!! The person changed for good and is a completely different version now.

Well this is probably not restricted to just one industry as I hear from colleagues working elsewhere like:-


In the Hospital, furious anesthetist 1 to anesthetist 2
“What kind of a person are you...How could you be so numb? “

Overheard at the psychiatrist’s conference
“You say another word and I ll split your personality!!”

Dentist’s over a brawl
“I ll fight tooth and nail to get it from you…Mister!!”

Between Politicians
“WHAT…WHAT did you call ME? A common Man!!”

Overheard in NASA.
“And who do you think you are…Mister Asstronaut!!!”

Pilots trying to be civil
Take off!!

Teachers
I ll teach you a lesson that you ll never forget!!

God’s not in a good mood.
To hell with you!!

Desi Electrician’s first day in USA
It was a cultural shock!!

Plumber to another Plumber
“And you beating me…eh. Talk of pipe dreams!!”

Upset plastic surgeon
“No point saving face here...I ll come after you anyways.”

Chef fights
Now you cook up some story...but it doesn’t cut any ice with me.

Nuclear scientist
Your reaction was way unacceptable Dr.Mehra.

Wall Street guys
I ll surely give you a run for you money!

Swiss watchmakers
I ll give you a hard time…

Ophthalmologist
We don’t see eye to eye on this matter.

Weather man’s curse
I forecast a miserable life for you.

Municipal worker to Boss
Rubbish. Rubbish…This is all what you talk! Uh!!

It seems we need to split our work life and personal life.
And I realized it even more when my colleague told me she delivered a baby boy and exceeded customer satisfaction of his Dad and Mom...Duh!

22 comments:

anN-series said...

Litigation lawyers go around asking-

"...where is mr mehta's brief...tell the junior to bring my briefs to the court, i will study them there" (see we talk a lot in brief/boxers shorts)

Hari said...

Interesting revelation(s). Bugs me that we use most of these in our conversations, don't we? I guess professional talk would gradually merge into our lives, thanks to media. :)

The first two paras were mind-blowingly-awesome!! :D

Unknown said...

LOL!!

Am sure that your release is behind schedule now..:D

നിലാവ് said...

It is every where...and my friend's mother is looking for new fimware versions to suit his architecture...

got it..? :)

that's a 'unix admin' version of marriage proposals..!!

Rahul Nair said...

Nowadays before we go shopping we have a requirements document with us...
There are no more problems in life as there used to be, only issues...

thomas said...
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thomas said...
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thomas said...

LOL! If you made all that, then probably you should send it to RD! They'll pay you a ton.
Product free of bugs? customer satisfaction of his Dad and Mom??? lol man lol!

Anonymous said...

LOL! This is my personal favorite:
Overheard at the psychiatrist’s conference
“You say another word and I'll split your personality!!”

One of my colleagues used to say "I have got to go early today, or I wont meet my wife's SLA"

silverine said...

All in a days work yeah?! :p

scorpiogenius said...

Good compilation dude...lol..

I liked the pilot's one...TAKE OFF!

Deepti said...

And IT guys say " we'll make weekend plans at run time!!"

Abhi said...

Awesome. I'd heard about some of these in joke circles. Loved the first two one's. Tell the configuration manager that he can be jailed if he asks that question to many ladies :)

Praveen said...

avde paranjathaanengilum ivdeyum parayaathe vayya..
onnonnara sambhavam thanne:D

This made me laugh all the more because I been noticing such words creeping into some of my friend's vocabs

Dhanya said...

LOL really good ones :)

Mishmash ! said...

LOL...especially desi electrician's cultural shock :))

This reminds me of those forwards we used to get....where the HR manager writes a love letter and using terms like "you will be on probation for 1 year and then based on ur performance and a proposal will be drafted....." Who knows....someone might be already forwarding ur piece :)

Pooja Nair said...

Sounds out of place but thats what makes it funny! :) had fun reading those jokes...

Divs said...

hehee... liked the pilot one! :)

mathew said...

@Ann
LOL!! you lawyers!!!;-P

@Hari
oh yeah..it creeps in always and we dont realise it...
thanks..:-)

@Abraham Menacherry
LOL!! hehehe..

@നിലാവ്
hehehe..yes..probably IT is the biggest influence on conversations..

@Rahul
Bingo...issues with different priorities!!;-D

@Thomman
Thanks...I was guessing all these are original..but Abhi mentioned that some are already out before..am not sure..:-(..anyways RD does still pay 500 rs isnt? ;-P

@Cris
LOL!!...yeah..it happens..

@Anju
You said it!! :-D

@scorpiogenius
thanks buddy..:-)

@Deepti
LOL!! weekend plans at runtime..good one!!:-)

@Abhi
thanks...are some of this already known? :-(
Configuration manager is still alive thanks to shortage of ladies in office..;-P

mathew said...

@Praveen
hahha..i think in our office it should be common practice..:-D

@Dhanya
thank you..:-)

@Mishmash
Thank you..
yes..i think i have got the same forward..it seems..
well i ll love to hear from other job sectors..ee IT kaare kondu thottu...:-)

@Pooja
thanks buddy..

@Divs
;-D

Usha said...

that was some hilarious compilation! :D

wait.. umm.. does that make me a musician by profession?

confucius said...

Overheard at the psychiatrist’s conference
“You say another word and I ll split your personality!!”

ROFTL...that was the best one