Sunday, December 16, 2007

time machine

Blog rating: -16(suitable only for kids under 16)

This post is not for you...it is for the next generation kids…

Some decades from now a grumpy old Mathew would be sitting near a riverside and a bunch of kids would come and talk to him…The kids having finished playing the last of the play stations because Sony would have ran out of ideas by then. They ask the senile man to tell stories of the past coz they had nothing else to do…

But the old man knew no stories and thought of teaching them things they never knew or heard of …So they all went to his house and squatted on the couch…That’s when he asked the youngest kid to go and get the Bible from the shelf…Little Bill gets that heavy book and is happy that the old man would actually read stories from his favourite book..

‘Son…why did you bring the Harry Potter…I asked you to get the Bible’
Glumly Bill asks him ‘Isn’t that the Bible. I thought that it was the one…I have been reading this ever since I remember’

‘So that’s the first thing I would like to tell you…The Bible came much before Harry Potter…I used to think Tintin was the Bible when I was a kid…you know..’

‘Children... probably you need to learn the basics first…tell me who is God’

There were eager faces ready to give answers…

‘Sachin??’

Uh...

‘Michael Jackson??’

‘Barbie’

‘Hohohohoh…children I think you are too young to learn all these…I think we have to leave this for another day…I tell you something else’

Many many years ago we used to have Postman…Do you know what a postman means…??

There are confused faces all around…

‘Okay…A postman was a person who used to send letters…He comes in a bicycle and puts the letter in your letter box…If say I wanted to send a letter from Delhi to Bangalore, I would first put the letter in a box in Delhi…and the postman would take the letter and give it another postman…and then finally the last postman would put it in the letter box in Bangalore…’
Amidst yawns one of them interrupts…

‘Apoopa…Do you mean...its something like e-mail...we just download it from our mailbox.’


‘Download..?? I thought we do that in the toilet…haven’t you got a better word for that.’

That’s when one of the older boys came to pick up his bro…He looked all angry and was seemingly furious…

‘What’s the matter son?’
‘Dint you know that...they are taking back our jobs…’
‘Whose jobs...do you mean that the one about closing down call centers of BPO companies’
‘Yeah...the Americans are taking it from us…they say its their right to handle the phone bills…electricity bills…of the people in United states...how audacious …’
‘But son...it was their job before we took it from em’
‘Old man...you don’t understand the times don’t you….uff…’


Now most of the kids had gone back home…Only Isabella was staying back and she walks with him to the church…

The old man meet a few priests and talked to the nun’s who were going for prayers…And after sometime when he looked at Isa, she was all sullen faced…

‘Why do you look sad mole?’

‘Am cross with you…Why dint you tell me it was Halloween today...we are the only people here without a costume…I want one of those white robes which all are wearing …please Apoopa’

It took lot of time to convince her the priests were not indeed the people who are in Halloween costumes…After sometime the old man walks back home contemplating the years bygone...On the way he met another bunch of older noisy kids who were like showing the middle finger at each other..

Children...what is that you young fellas are doin here...’

‘Hey...that’s how we say hello to each other…quite customary oldie’

‘Really??.…think am really out of touch with the times…we used to do it with folded hands and say namaste…the new style looks a bit weird though…’

‘Never mind ...my hello to you fellas….’

No points for guessing how the old man said hello…

17 comments:

anN-series said...

hello mathew (not in the new style however)
nice post...mebbe u shud also tell them that before a keyboard/touchscreen a pen/pencil existed.....

btw i saw some real mallu progress. the children's names improved to Isabella and Bill (from litty, titty, kitty and nicemon, flymon pokemon)

amna said...

hehehe.. barbie? god? hahahaha

silverine said...

The nuns and priests in Bangalore have already evolved to wear salwar and sarees :) btw by the time those kids arrive, we will be telling them stories of trees and jungles and the animals that lived in them..the cities we had and the planes and cars that we used as transport. The kids used to kaalawandis will look in admiration at us oldies :)

silverine said...

That should read The nuns and priests in Bangalore have already evolved to wear salwar and sarees and pants" :p

Dhanya said...

Ooops that was actually scary.. they way we r progressing.. :(

wanderlust said...

scary!! but true to some extent

ദീപു : sandeep said...

Some serious thinking :)

It is really scary.... and Harry Potter for Bible .........;)

eljo said...

hey, i sense pessimism. whats the matter? our previous generation beleived that they lived the good life which to an extent our generation will surely believe when we turn old.

anN-series said...

jus noticed one more thing....y do children think that michael jackson is god....as part of responsible parenting, Apoopa u shud explain to them that he is satan(at least as long as they r children) and neverland is hell(tht is if neverland exists then and is not sealed and sold off to pay his creditors)

Usha said...

hehe.. 3 cheers to the old man! :)

btw, i've already made up my mind to make 3d movies for storytelling, post retirement. -*conditions apply, though!

Mishmash ! said...

LOL at Ann 's response :)

To an extent, a realistic situation and you painted it with humour and irony! But on a serious note,if this really happens,then wont that be a failure of the current generation and the next one? !!!

Nanditha Prabhu said...

u have crafted a future which was interesting to read but i dare not imagine!
what made you take this leap into future?..apoopa!

mathew said...

@Ann series
Athe athe..lets see what the future has in store for us..
And yeah Isabella is one of my favourite girl names.. ;-P

@Nags
;-P
@Anju
You have mirrored an even much scarier picture… :-0

@Dhanya
I hope it doesn’t get worse than this

@wanderlust
Unfortunately yeahh.

@Sandeep
Hehehe..tintin man..tintin.. ;-P

@Elijo
I was just not feel really happy the day I posted this..now its perfect happiness now that the holidays are round the corner..

@Annammoo
Yeah..yeah..;-P
Ejactly..

@Usha
Wow..will I get a job there..sounds attractive..am already tired of the current job.,.

@Mishmash
Athe..its so true..it is upto to us redeem ourselves and the next generation…I hope it is not as bad as I have pictured..

@nanditha
Praayam aayi veruvalle..atleast have to pretend that am thinking.. ;-P

Di said...

we used to love the class-wise crib makin contests we had in school and all the preparation for the d-day and the santa..mmm..christmas :)

Jina said...

hey..dats scary..but i love scary posts..so no points in guessing wat i feel abt it..:)

Priyankari said...

Hahaha...Really funny dude! And seems scarily true too!

Anonymous said...

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