Yes!!!Secretary!!!

Since we are planning to make it big in the United Nations and show the world that we have a say in world matter’s, we are searching for qualified people who can withstand the strain of the job. For the not well informed it involves flying to exotic countries...grinning in photo ops with world leaders and blabbering speeches on world peace and bending your back to lay a few foundation stones. The candidate should always exhibit an air of optimism even if a few lakhs are killed in some battle of Pedurasia!!!! Candidate is expected to turn a blind eye towards the actions of a few countries that might accidentally bomb some rogue/thief/dacoit country.

My own nominations for UN secretary General...

Crackie Savent

A woman of actions and gyrations!! She has been very generous in donating her entire wardrobe bearing a few essentials to various social organizations taking into consideration the scarcity of clothing’s in the third world. Artists have come out in her support for her endeavor in promoting belly dancing. She has risen battling all odds...fighting...dodging...scratching asses and exhibiting complicated yogic postures which are part of her regular educational videos...Braving social stigmas after she was brutally smooched in a party, her conscience struck her one fine morning and now is apparently the poster girl for woman progression...

Raul Ahagen

Having being part of power corridors back home he shouldn’t find himself a stranger in the UN .He has promised to look into illegal trade of some illegal “something” happening at some desolate region near Cambodia popularly called Golden Triangle. Flying skills can be used in UN reconnaissance operations as they are facing shortage of skilled Pilots...Indian politicians’ promote him as a role model especially for youngsters...But experts speculate his health as he known to faint without any reason.

Yerjun sin ghe

Very few people are as good as he with numbers...especially his “Law of reservation percentages” is widely considered as a mathematically wizardry...Since the UN is all about management, his skills as a minister (which is highly appreciated inside medical students circle) will be critical. Rumors say he will be supplying nuclear fissile material to North Korea and Calvin Klein clothing’s to drought prone Mozambique as they are entitled to as per his perfected “Kota theory”. This Media darling will be sponsored by ODBC, OFADPREC and ORTPC.

Any terrorist currently operating in Kashmir

It’s often mistaken that we resort to violence to achieve our objectives. The bombs that go off daily are actually some sophisticated fireworks which just blows off due to the heat of the moment!! UN needs skilled soldiers and I can supply any number of any kind, of any age, of any sex.Although the UN will have to shell out more for the “kamikaze’ variety. I frequently visit Delhi to negotiate peace but I return via Bombay to plant a few fireworks incase folks out there miss diwali!! ! My extensive network and ISI trademarks should definitely make me the best guy for the job!!!